Saturday, March 28, 2009

I cried myself to sleep last night

I cried myself to sleep last night --
And not because of sorrow,
But of joy --
For my boy
Would be baptized on the morrow.


There was a time when being here today seemed like a long shot. Even last night I felt like King Stefan in Sleeping Beauty, like we should still be burning spinning wheels or something.

But the day came, and I was able to watch my son be baptized and confirmed at the hand of my husband. I was even able to sing a solo during the program, despite being half-brained and half-deaf.

We were surrounded by family members--including my parents and parents-in-law, and all of my brothers and their families--and I didn't have to be lying in a box to bring them here!

It was a moment made possible by the grace of a loving God (and sponsored in part by Kleenex).







5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congrats Krista!!! I know it is so hard to realize that they have grown. But it is also so very fun to see how they progress. Love ya tons.
Roshannah

Kate said...

Oh Krista! :)
What a wonderful blessing! Congrats to Jacob on his baptism, and congrats to you on being here still . . . half-brained and half-deaf though you may think yourself.
I cried for you today . . . tears of joy as well! :)
~Kate~
(formerly of 2ofus4now)

mommymuse said...

YAY! I love those happy pics! Happy tears for you!!!

Hmm...my word verification is "thful". Is that the abbreviated version of "Thankful"?

Anonymous said...

Jacob is one cute little boy! Congratulations!

Anonymous said...

You are an inspiration!!!! My friend was diagnosed with stage 3/4 anaplastic astrocytoma in the cerebellum in Nov/08. We were in a relationship and living together for 2 years prior to the diagnosis. I had left him a month before the diagnosis because the prior two years with him had been totally unbearable. He was/is emotionally abusive and very controlling. He has been told he could live up to 4 years with his diagnosis. He is extremely negative and shows no need to fight. He comes from a very dysfunctional family and since he basically turns everyone away when they offer help, I'm basically on my own with all this. I decided to stay with him after the diagnosis since I wanted to be with him during this hard time. I offered my friendship and my constant support but he has only shown me resentment and hatred..although he doesn't want me to leave. So we live in the same house but I do everything. He spends his days watching TV. He has recently stopped eating. On average, he eats a bowl of cereal during the day and waits for me to cook him some supper when I get back from work. He then takes a small plate. He probably consumes less then 800 calories a day. He's been doing this for a month. He started his 5 days per month temodal on Monday.. and before that, he was not taking nay meds and was in no pain at all for almost a month. At the last appointment, the Doc said that their is a lot less cancer activity and there is shrinkage... but he seems to be mad at this. It did not encourage him as I hoped it would. He still is not moving at all. He says he has absolutely no pain and says he's tired.
So.. all this to ask you a simple question. How was your energy level? Were you a fighter and soooo amazing from the start? There are stages but Jeff has not changed a bit in 5 months. He's just getting more and more mad.
I'm going to be 30 years old in a week. I have not kids. I'm an art teacher and am very passionate about life, work, my family, music. I live my life being the best I can be.. and spreading joy around me.. but being with Jeff is killing me. He is crushing my spirit. I would've never imagined having to fight this fight for him, and I'm not sure I can continue on this way.
You are truly an inspiration and I will send really positive vibes you way!!