Not for the Spineless

(I just knew that had to be said somewhere in here!)

Two days of radiation are behind me, and they were a blast for the 'blast! After yesterday's first zapping, I stopped by Dr. Fink's office and got my head tapped. It's a lot more comfortable than a spinal tap, getting fluid drained out of the Ommaya Reservoir ("Oh, my! A reservoir!"). Just checking more spots to see if tumor cells are floating around in there, as the previous taps have come up negative. Hopefully this means the mass is just stuck to the wall of the spine and not spilling bad stuff anywhere else. It's just paralyzed with fear and waiting to be defeated.

I had a nostalgic moment last night, starting back on the Temodar routine. Eat a light dinner, wait 90 minutes, take anti-nausea pills and seizure meds, wait another 30 minutes, take Temodar, and sit up for another 30 minutes. No late-night snacking. I magically woke up two pounds lighter, even though I'm on steroids again!

I'm also lighter in my step -- literally. I have foot drop. My black-belted, clog-dancing, neuro-test-acing right foot is now unable to stand on tiptoe, and I walk a little funny now. I stay away from stairs, and I have to avoid tripping. (So the kids are charged with clearing all pathways in the house!) It's not unusual in people with sciatic problems, but my amazing neuromuscular strength was always a reassuring sign until now. Even so -- there are many other things on the complications buffet that I am happy to pass over for this one.

On Thursday, following radiation, I will be staying at the medical center for a double delight: Topotecan in the head, and Avastin in the arm. It will take most of the day, and will add to the hustle and bustle of downtown trips and children's schedules and all of the good stuff of life.

I am so grateful to be surrounded by family and church friends and angels from all over the place, who are eagerly at hand to meet every need. Between the logistical help (rides, meals, childcare, errands, etc.) and the spiritual support of prayers and fasting, I am definitely feeling the love. This helps me square my shoulders, straighten (what's left of) my spine, and move forward (foot-drop and all) with my life.